Friday, October 31, 2003
when i was seventeeeeeennnnnnn.....
very recently (about 6 hours ago)...i was told by my dad that i have another half brother. apparently (i use this term because i'm still in a state of shock) he was born on deepavali...prematurely i might add by about 4 weeks. oh...if u have no idea what i'm talking about here's a summary. my parents are separated...my dad has a girlfriend/mistress/concubine whatever you might wanna call it...and together with her he has 4 children...all of which are below the age of 7. who knows how many other children he has that we might not know about. i wouldn't be surprised if i'm 40 and this lady/man comes knocking on my door claiming to be my brother/sister. gosh...my dad is officially a man-whore (sorry dad...but i really think you are). you must be wondering how i can speak about this so openly and freely. well...i guess i've reached the point where i'm able to laugh about it.i've manage to land myself an interview with 'seventeen' magazine. not exactly 'seventeen' but the company that publishes it. they also publish 'female'. it's not exactly the kinda magazine i wanna work for but beggars can't be choosers. i've got no experience and no qualifications to write so i can't be picky can i? anyway...i'm actually quite amazed that they shortlisted me so that by itself is an achievement. i'm hopeful and excited about the interview but i'm pretty sure i'm not going to get the job. i don't even know what position they're interviewing me for but whatever it is i believe that i probably won't fit the bill. oh well...interviews are fun anyway and i haven't been to one in about 2 years so it's about time i refresh my memory...see whether i still have it in me to bullshit my way through.
i was thinking of writing something thought-provoking but now i'm just stumped. how can i even consider being a writer if i'm going to be plagued with writers block most of the time?
matrix is coming out soon...i'm counting down the days. that was quick wasn't it. it felt like only yesterday that i was trying to digest the second installment and before i could dissect it and shortlist the many conclusions i have in my head...the final installment is due to be released in less than a week. i still have no idea what to believe...how will the movie end? i have a feeling it'll be an anti-climax...one of those movies which will make you stare blandly at the screen while the credits are rolling with your jaw falling halfway off your face and during that whole time the words 'what the fuck?' echoes in your mind. i had that moment with a lot of movies.... 'once upon a time in mexico' being the most recent one. although it might be a disappointment i'm definitely catching the movie the day it opens.
LOTR is also due to be released soon. i don't know whether knowing the ending is a plus or minus with this particular movie. i read the book so i basically know what's going to happen next. the movie obviously wouldn't be as exciting as it would be if i hadn't read the book but i don't know whether i could've contained myself for another year without knowing the ending. i am eager to check out the effects for the final installment though. it's going to be one exciting movie that's for sure.
i've decided to postpone getting a tattoo for a couple of weeks because of tuesdays interview and also because i have no idea what kinda design i want or where i'm going to get it. i have too many things on my mind right now and getting a tattoo is definitely not on the top of the list..it's nowhere near the top of the list actually. but i'll eventually get it done i suppose...always wanted one.
went fishing with a few friends yesterday. technically i didn't fish. i sat around making a whole lot of noise. if you go to nottifish.com you can see two very good looking guys with cards on their foreheads. they look silly ey? anyway...i devised that so called game if you can really call it a game. it was fun while it lasted until i was losing about 40 bucks...then i got really serious. eventually i managed to break even and run away with 5 bucks as well. thank god ben didn't take a picture of me with a card on my forehead. we might look really stupid but we were having fun.
anyway...here's your updates sui san.
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feefs, 12:18 PM
Tuesday, October 28, 2003
I'm leetz0r to the max0r!!!
For u babes... mUaks.. i gotta run.. alan is already downstairs..$%#%@#$@!%#$^$%&^#%^&%^
54@%$^%&%^&^%&%^$#%@#@!$
%#!@#$!@#%#$@^$@%^%^#$@^
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feefs, 6:00 PM
haven't updated in ages..i was too busy doing nothing that i forgot about this damned thing. once again it's past 7am which basically means i haven't slept all night and will probably wake up at 5pm later today. spent most of my night watching reruns on astro.
a weird thing happened today. all the atm machines in hartamas were 'unable to dispense cash' simultaneously. a few friends and i were broke...i was probably the richest one among all 4 of us with a WHOPPING 26 bucks and 40 cents in my wallet. we went to 3 banks in hartamas only to be disappointed so we drove all the way to a petrol station to press money. the guys ended up buying toothbrushes from the petrol station mart which brings me to my next topic.
personally i won't buy a toothbrush from a petrol station unless it was absolutely necessary. it was then i realized that guys don't really think twice when it comes to shopping even if it's for groceries or essential items such as toothbrushes or toilet paper or something. i prefer to do my shopping at supermarkets...or pharmacies. not because i'm picky and sophisticated but because i could probably get it cheaper at supermarkets and because they probably have a wider range of items. guys go for the more convenient route. they see something and it's either yes or no.... there's no contemplation...no thought put into it (and that doesn't only apply to shopping). sometimes i wonder which is better...being straight forward or being selectively thrifty. oh well...i guess there is no right or wrong...better or worse when it comes to gender.
notice how we sometimes blame certain things on gender.
men cheat - reason: they're guys
women nag - reason: they're women
men don't shave their armpits - reason: they're men
women don't fart in public - reason: they're women
men are insensitive - reason: they're men
women are too sensitive - reason: they're women
don't get me wrong..there are differences between men and women (although i'd like to believe in equality). women are no doubt physically gentler than men are and men are without a doubt physically stronger than women. other than physical differences i don't see how we are different emotionally. guys cheat and it's acceptable...girls cheat and we're automatically labelled a 'slut'. women cry and it's acceptable...men cry and they're pussies. what's with the double standards?? i know how to fix a flat tyre...i know how to use a screwdriver. i know this isn't going anywhere but i hate it when guys perceive girls to be needy...or at least the needier one of the two (or is it *seven) sexes.
anyway...i've recently started seeing this guy (in a purely platonic way). he's intelligent...witty...and we get along really well. the thing is...i've heard a whole lot of negative things about this particular guy from our mutual friends. i am obviously closer to these people than he is or was. i haven't noticed anything wrong with him yet. but after hearing all the stories and all the opinions...i find myself trying harder to find faults in him than i did before. then i realized that other people's judgements are becoming my own. it's funny how powerful 'bitching' can be. we bitch about people without thinking of the repercussions it could have not only to us but to others as well. like i was telling a friend...judgement is a very powerful thing. we judge people everyday..our friends..our colleagues..even the fella selling char kuey teow. we see a person that we deem 'ah lian' walking down the street and we're elbowing each other going 'ah lian ah lian'. we see an indian driving a merc and we assume it's the driver. i'm definitely an extremist when it comes to judging.
anyone can definitely tell you right of the bat that i'm one judgmental bitch with lots of opinions...most of them are usually negative and that i'm not afraid to put it all out there. i believe opinions...regardless of whether it's negative or positive should be shared.
i will end this post with one question. how much of what we see is what we get?
*by seven sexes i refer to men, women, gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transexuals and transvestites.
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feefs, 3:25 PM
Friday, October 17, 2003
please work
i still cannot seem to get this thing working. at first i was quite eager to take up the challenge of solving problems but now i'm just spent. i'm not a very patient person as u can see...neither am i a very bright one. oh well..i guess this will just have to do.i've been missing this past few days...didn't have the time nor the facilities to update anything. didn't have the mood either. this week has passed by really fast. where does the time go? i spend a lot of time doing nothing but i don't realize it until it's gone. as the saying goes...'u don't know what u've got till it's gone'.
played futsol wednesday night. i think it's going to be a regular wednesday night activity. this weeks game was abusive. it was partly because i just took my hepB jab 2 hours prior to the game and my arm was still sore. i got elbowed in the back..kicked in the shin...multiple times...and i busted my right knee. not funny. didn't really have mood to play after the knee busting incident so i just stood around doing nothing just to balance out the teams.
i participated in some stupid personality test that based on birthdays and i'm shocked. i'm a chestnut tree...never seen one...don't know if i ever will. and apparently...chestnut trees only love once. how lame is that. i have loved once so does that mean my ship has sailed and i'm doomed to be alone for the rest of my life. i'm kinda having a 'sex and the city' moment right about now. oh well...if i'm doomed i'm doomed. i'll just have to buy a 'buzzulator' and a pet dog :)
just for sow's sake...here's what i'd do if i was the dictator of korea.
1. declare 2 weeks of public holidays each month
2. legalize gambling, drugs and prostitution
3. execute anyone with an i.q lower than 120
4. hire someone to do the rest of the thinking for me
there's a rave this thursday...i've got my ticket but i'm thinking twice about going now. if i don't go it's a sign of aging...and besides i don't have anything else to do. but if i do i might not enjoy myself. but my dear friend andrew says he'll cut off my balls and feed it to the dogs if i don't go. seeing that i don't have balls i'd just have to strap some on and get my ass to the rave.
missed linkin park. no biggie for me since i'm not exactly a fan. although i do think the lead singer can sing...but they're songs are not my type. i heard it was an excellent not-to-be-missed performance though. oh well...personally i'd rather go to 'riverdance'..but unfortunately no one is interested to go with me. early bird tickets are already out so i guess if i decide to go it'll be a spontaneous thing.
anyway..that's about all i have to say today. not sleeping for a few days is not funny. like i've said before..it's deadly. one of these days i shall really have to test the limits of this theory. until then...i'm going to catch up on my wet dreams.
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feefs, 1:08 AM
Saturday, October 11, 2003
blogging about boggling
i seem to be addicted to the game of boggle. if u don't know what boggle is it's a word game...kinda like an anagram game. anyway...i've been playing it everyday with my friend jen..we bring it everywhere we go just in case. talk about really having nothing to do.chilled out at friday's on saturday night..quite a nice night. and what did we do at fridays....played boggle. the night ended pretty early cause we had nothing to do and some of us were tired. i wanted to catch 'matchstick men' at the cinemas but apparently it hasn't opened yet. oh well...i guess that means i'll have something to do next weekend.
might be going for a play at actors studio tomorrow afternoon. hopefully i can wake up on time...and hopefully i'll be alert enough to understand the play. don't wanna be falling asleep in the middle of the show when there's a crowd. did i mention that the man who sat next to me when i went to watch LXG fell asleep and he was snoring so loud that he woke himself up.
anyway...it's been an unfruitful weekend. friday night was board game night at andrews. which was quite fun cause we played twister and i got twisted with some friends. played boggle and pictionary as well. had to drink a little cause i couldn't draw the 'big ben' with my eyes closed.
oh well...thank god i teach music.
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feefs, 3:15 PM
Thursday, October 09, 2003
unproductivity
today must have been the most unproductive day i've had all week. woke up really late...but then again i slept really late too. went for mcd's breakfast with my beloved this morning. they have the best hash browns!!!heard about this new place at sheraton imperial called the kit kat lounge. i wanna go check it out. sounds kinda surreal. i'm probably going to catch that play at actors studio called 'harakiri'. sounds japanese but it's actually not. actually...i'm curious to know what the title has to do with the entire play. maybe it's like the song 'iris' by goo goo dolls where u don't hear them mention the title throughout the entire song once.
wanted to catch matchstick men at the cinemas tomorrow but i'm probably going to chill out at a friends place instead. should be fun...break the monotony for one day :)
i think the lack of sleep is finally getting to me. it took awhile but i'm finally starting to feel exhausted. i read somewhere about how insomnia can cause death. my obituary would read..."died of insomnia. may she rest in peace". ironic isn't it :)
today was nothing special. my life is pretty monotonous. wednesday seems to be futsol night nowadays. today..i finally got to be goalie :) didn't do so well at it. then again..i suck at futsol. it's something different though.
went out for a drink with a friend just now and it lasted about 3 hours. there's not many people around that i can have a drink with for 3 hours. usually after an hour there'll be some bland staring so it was nice to actually go out and have intelligent conversation with someone that i don't see often. i'm not insinuating that my friends are not intelligent. it's just that i see them so often there's nothing much to talk about anymore.
it's funny how i've grown so attached and complacent with things. i see my friends everyday...i eat the same food everyday...i go to the same places everyday...gawd...reminds me of the movie 'groundhog day'. that is why u guys in melbourne and everywhere else in the world should come back. even then i doubt things would change but having the extra company would be nice :)
caught two movies in the past one week. watched underworld and once upon a time in mexico. none of which are oscar material..neither were they very memorable.
anyway...final note..i've turned into a compulsive gambler. save me!
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feefs, 11:57 AM
